Dearest,
I’ve read more than I ever want to know about your potential medical condition. I am fearful for you. I just want to hold you and cry. I know I catastrophize too much, but I can’t imagine your fear, and the fear you constantly live with about cancer and side effects. I pray that you let me in and that god keeps you well and safe. I know we all die, and that not everyone reaches old age, but I want you around me a very long time. We will face this fear. And, should we find you have a less than healthy diagnosis, I pray you will let me be your support, your crutch. Maybe this is god’s purpose for my life, to be a caregiver. I have so much love to give and I want to be with you – no matter the circumstance!
I hope you sleep well. I will try to sleep, but it is difficult to sleep without holding you. All my love to you.
P.S. I feel like an ass for worrying about how you feel about me when you are facing such challenges.
