This is my last day to go shopping. Christmas eve day will be full of church and family time, with no time to run errands. I hate shopping. The searching, crowds, buying crap. I’m glad you finally got your syrup. (I wish I could do more.)
When I look back, my favorite memories are dinner at the Blue Cat and bringing you flowers at the airport. You always deserve flowers at the airport! (And, not to give to your mother!)
What are your doing on Christmas? Working?
Author: Him
A story of love lost. Just a guy in love with a woman that doesn't want a relationship with him. She moved away and married someone else. I have shared this blog with her, and she knows the truth. I tried. I waited for a while. But, none of it worked. She is married to someone else now, but still drops into my life now and again. I am trying to move on. But, she was my one true love that inspired me to be a better person. If any of this story has meaning to you, please let me know. Thank you.
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I know you don’t understand my confusion, but you have a girlfriend. You live together. Why do you need(or want) me in your life? Is one woman not enough???
Blue Cat was fun, and the flowers at the airport were very nice, but I enjoyed a lot of the stuff that was not planned. I enjoyed the more relaxed times, brewery tour(except Middlebury which hurt and made me angry, I think that was the first time I realized you were capable of hurting me), Celtics game-no one has ever done that for me!! Basketball!!! Celtics!!! Playoff game!!! The thing that was hard for me was I always felt you were trying too hard. Life should be easier. When you took me to CM after my dad died, got me sushi and sat with me, on a bench in the hot July sun, talked WITH me and made me eat, sticks out in my mind. You made me laugh for the first time in a while.
I’m laying in bed, crying…. I want you to be happy. You deserve to love and be loved. I don’t think I am capable of loving anyone completely. I did that once, and it still hurts to think about it. I’d rather hurt alone than make someone else suffer through my misery.
I never tried hard. It came naturally. I wanted to experience EVERYTHING with you. Celtics games, brewery tours, Blue Cat, Bobcat, Pho,and many more. I too, want you to be happy. That is why I helped pack you up. Because you wanted it.
Yes, I have a companion now. As you did before me. I’m not trying to confuse you. I am only telling you my feelings (which I know don’t quite align with reality at times).
But, you are there and I am here. For now, we can only be friends, and as your friend, I want you to know I love you and support you as you find your way and face your struggles. You are never far from my heart and always present in my thoughts and prayers.
Happy New Year, and may it be a better year for both of us.