Delusional thinking

Somehow, I just keep thinking about Valentines Day. The time I sent you flowers. The time you ran off to Canada and I sat in your parking lot for nearly six hours wishing I could see you. And now.

I just have an overwhelming feeling….that I miss you. I feel like I want to send you calla lilies.

I know I can’t do that. You’re married. And I don’t want to be the ex that causes a shit storm. As well as I don’t want to cause my own shit storm here.

But, I still can’t stop wondering what would have happened if it was me that you married.

Author: Him

A story of love lost. Just a guy in love with a woman that doesn't want a relationship with him. She moved away and married someone else. I have shared this blog with her, and she knows the truth. I tried. I waited for a while. But, none of it worked. She is married to someone else now, but still drops into my life now and again. I am trying to move on. But, she was my one true love that inspired me to be a better person. If any of this story has meaning to you, please let me know. Thank you.

4 thoughts on “Delusional thinking”

  1. It’s 1230sm on Monday and I’m laying in bed thinking how do I get divorced…… Would you really want to be married to me? I am incapable of being in a committed relationship. I get like every day I die a little more……

    1. Married or not, I just wanted to be in partnership with you. For you and I to be “us”. Yes, I was going to propose. Not to own you, but to lift you up in our struggles in the world.

      I’m sorry you feel like you die a little each day in marriage.

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