Month: January 2015

What will the day bring?

Yes, I am concerned about Sunday. I try to keep an open mind and I will try to listen, but my expectations are low. If it were good news for me you would have just told me outright.

I miss you and you know I want you in my life, but that may not be possible. I will come (if you still want me to) on Sunday and listen. I may need a while to formulate my response. No matter what we say or how we move forward from here, I loved you.

** I see I have been dropped again as your friend. I feel like you are building separation – maybe the separation you need. I feel at a loss.

2 Comments:

Her – 1/10/2015 12:09:47 pm
You commented on a post when you saw me so I unfriended you. I didn’t want you to be hurt, and I knew you were. I know you prefer if I stay home and not talk to anyone, but that is not me….

Her 1/11/2015 09:58:45 am
Thank you for being so honest today. I have cried some more. My mom would say my eyes look like “2 piss holes in the snow”. I appreciate you coming here and talking. I am sorry that I hurt you!

I just don’t know what to do. I try to act normal, pretend things will work out, but at each turn I feel more sadness. I forced myself out of bed today to go to church, only to have my car die. I walked down to work to try and keep my mind busy, but I am cluttered with thoughts of you – good thoughts of past times and prayers for you.

I know life moves on and time marches past. Thank you for your comments, at least I feel like you don’t hate me. As for the photo – its of a great time we had together, and that isn’t recognizable. My other photos of you I keep for myself, not to share with the world.

1 Comment: Her – I have no reason to hate you. I care about you. I love you. I just don’t want a relationship. You cannot handle that. It puts at am impasse…… 1/4/15

I hope you are well. I wanted to comment on your Facebook post but felt you may not welcome me yet. I am lost waiting for you. I switch from computer to phone and back to computer checking to see if you’ve sent me a note, a text, or a comment. I have written so many messages to you, only to delete them. They all say the same thing in different ways: I miss you.

I’ll hang around a while longer, and life moves forward with or without me. All my best to you always.

1 Comment: Her – Thank you for the Facebook message. It is always nice to know someone worries about me. 1/3/16

I only said goodbye until you are ready to bring me back into your life- if that is what you decide. I will love you always. I want you and I don’t know if I can stop wanting you to be mine.